Some Pencils (a.k.a. My First Post)

Post examples of your sequential story telling work like comics, animation storyboards, and layouts.

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Some Pencils (a.k.a. My First Post)

Postby Devin_T » Sun Apr 03, 2011 6:20 pm

Howdy Folks,

This is my first ever post, so please forgive any faux pas. This is the prologue for a comic idea a friend and I are working on, the first page is too big so I'll just put the link up: http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_XlsxjU121co/SvOaOkHKLBI/AAAAAAAAAMk/KwrQIBZJ-1U/s1600-h/woofcomicpage1.jpg.
I'm really excited to get my work out to a creative community such as this so any critique is always welcome.

Thanks for taking a peek,

Devin Taylor http://skeletron1.blogspot.com
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Postby Steev » Mon Apr 04, 2011 9:55 am

I like it!

Panel 2.6 is kinda wonky with the girls blending into each other but really cool stuff here. :D
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Postby beccainabox » Wed Apr 13, 2011 4:26 pm

These are amazing, I love the emotion, especially in the last pages.
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Postby Mystic 7 » Sat Apr 30, 2011 8:44 am

Hey, Devin,

You have some good ideas, but you tend to repeat yourself. Sequential art is about constantly moving the story forward. There are several places where you changed the camera angle when you moved the action to a new panel, but failed to advance your story. It's a common mistake that's made by all new comickers. Remember, get to the point and move on.

Please continue to post more pages.

Peace,
KB
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Postby Devin_T » Wed May 18, 2011 5:13 pm

Thanks a billion for the comments, there isn't much point to doing this stuff in a box. This is exactly the kind of stuff I'm looking for. I'll return the favour <-- yep I'm a Canadian should the opportunity present itself.

Cheers,

Devin
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Re: Some Pencils (a.k.a. My First Post)

Postby Eb0la » Tue Jun 28, 2011 5:24 am

Nice artwork, I'm no specialist but the layout looks good with varied camera positions and framing.
I'd have to agree with above though, unless the panels are full of meaningfull text, the storytelling looks like "I'll show everything", ending up very slow. For instance page 3 werewolf leaving the house could use one less panel, although last panel is not necessary IMHO.
Readers are very capable of figuring out what's going on and what characters feel without having to show all of it. It's only my opinion. Just remember the pencils are very good :-)
[url]http://pascalgonzalezgallery.appspot.com/artist/gonzalez[/url]
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Re: Some Pencils (a.k.a. My First Post)

Postby GinyuCommand » Thu Aug 04, 2011 2:38 am

wow, freaking awesome. love how expressive the characters are. keep them coming!
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