Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull

[MoochasaurusRex]

Surely everyone should be excited about this?

Lets just hope it doesn't end up overloaded with CG.

Actually, Lucas and Speilberg said early on that it will have very limited CG. They really want to do it as old school as possible.

I can't believe I said old school. These guys re-created the old school, and created the NEW school to boot!

Remember back on Page 1 when everybody's hopes were so high? Seems like eons ago...

My hopes were never high for this film. I guess that's why I enjoyed it, no expectation and all....

[Scripe]

I'm going on vacation next week so I can finally go see it. Considering all the shit it's catching here I'm expecting Ishtar 2.

[Tinman2040]

I've seen this twice, and really enjoyed it. Certainly not a Classic but not as bad as people make it out to be!!

[Scripe]

I really liked it a lot too. I must say it is my least favorite of all of the films but I have no problem adding this film to Indy archive. I guess I should thank you guys for lowering the bar for me somewhat. Now If Lucas was serious about continuing the franchise with Mutt cast as the lead I'll probably skip any future installments.

[Radio_jalopiE]

I saw it twice too and I have to agree, while it's the worst of the four I felt like I was actually watching an indiana jones movie. unlike starwars where I actually forgot what I was watching in the middle of attack of the clones.

[Elliotanimated]

I have just returned from this artless, witless nonsense.
I agree with every negative comment made about this film.
It's awful.
Did they make it over a weekend in someone's back yard?
It sure feels that way.
It is incredibly hard to believe that this film was directed by Stephen Spielburg - it's amateurish on almost every level, especially the script which is confusing and aimless but mostly uninteresting.

Questions:
1) Why do we care about Ray Winstone's character, and why did Indy remain his chum after his treacherous behaviour?
2) If Oxley took the head from the skeleton in the first place, why does replacing it make the spaceship fly away?
3) What was the purpose of the kung-fu monkey people in the graveyard?
4) What was the point of the quicksand scene?
etc etc etc

[Scripe]

Questions:
1) Why do we care about Ray Winstone's character, and why did Indy remain his chum after his treacherous behaviour?
2) If Oxley took the head from the skeleton in the first place, why does replacing it make the spaceship fly away?
3) What was the purpose of the kung-fu monkey people in the graveyard?
4) What was the point of the quicksand scene?

I'll take a go at these.

1) I suppose for the same reason he expressed a bit of sorrow when Sotipo died after betraying him in Raiders, or when he tried to save the life of the Chief Guard he was fighting on the rock crusher in Temple of Doom, or when he tried to save the life of Ilsa after she betrayed him and his father in Crusade. He?s not a heartless bastard even with those peaople who made bad decisions.

2) Oxley didn?t take the head from the spaceship; Francisco de Orellana the conquistador took the Skull, perhaps from Mayan natives. As for why the ship flew away, it may have had to do with the request of the one who returned the skull. Or maybe the alien was just pissed for having its head removed for so long that it decided to leave.

3) I thought that they were locals trying to kill grave robbers or from ancient tribes trying to protect their shit, and the fighting style was Capoeira which was developed in South America between the 16th and 19th centuries.

4) To put Marion and Jones in a confession situation. Apparently, if Marion hadn?t told Indy in all these years that he had a son, she wasn?t likely to tell him at all unless she was in a situation where she might be about to die.

[Elliotanimated]

Let's assume you are correct (I am sure you are, I wasn't paying enough attention).
However:

1) Fair enough.
2) So Oxley didn't take it. It doesn't matter who took it. Why does replacing it activate it? Why??? It was sitting there for hundreds of years until it was taken. Why does putting it back start the engine?
3) Let's assume these "Capoeira" guys were taken out of the film, would it make the storytelling/plot any different? (The answer is yes, it would make it better).
4) They could have had that scene anywhere. Why bother to create a whole new (tension/comedy and action free) scene just to crowbar that information in?
Bad film making.

[Scripe]

Replacing the skull brings the still active hive minds of the Aliens back to a full awakening, not the ship. Apparently even for aliens there is life after death and their afterlife still has the ability to manipulate the physical world. With highly advanced telepathic and telekinetic abilities their craft had no need for physical, manual controls. So instead of using their hands they use their minds. When the skull was replaced the hive mind was complete and the alien had sufficient cognizance to activate the ship through a telekinesis. I know it's convoluted but for aliens it's plausible.

Perhaps taking the Capoeira guys out would have been better, but I liked it when Indy blew the dart back in the guy?s throat.

Your right about the quicksand scene, it could have happened anywhere else in the movie, like the waterfall, or the ants. I did laugh when they threw the snake in his face though.

[krisvahl]

I did laugh when they threw the snake in his face though.

In a jungle full of branches and vines, who grabs a f$#%ing snake to use as a rope. That was just a really lame setup for an Indy gag.

[Scripe]

In a jungle full of branches and vines, who grabs a fucking snake to use as a rope. That was just a really lame setup for an Indy gag.

I guess it would be someone with nothing larger than a switchblade to cut them down with and two people quickly sinking in the sand?

Sorry, this started as just answering some questions with some possibilities, I don't want to become and Indy 4 apologist. Like I said, it's my least favorite, but I can't help it, I liked it.

[Doh]

I agree with Eliot when he agreed with me.

[Elliotanimated]

Also - and I think someone's mentioned this earlier in the thread.
Is the Crystal Skull itself the shittest movie prop ever made?
A plastic head full of freezer bags.
Who was approving this stuff?
Who was making the creative decisions.

Ya know, the more I think about this film the angrier it makes me.
Steven Spielberg and friends are allowed to make mistakes.
Everyone does.
But this isn't just a mistake.
It's a hamfisted, amateurish stumble.
And it's not like anyone here was attempting anything new.
It's not like SS had never made an action adventure film before and was attempting new and exciting things.
There is NOTHING in the film that makes it an Indiana Jones film.
Not one line of snappy dialogue.
A complete lack of excitement or danger.
The mystical aspects of the film are dull.
Who really felt a single thing when Indy looked into the eyes of the skull?
Who was waiting for the spooky special effect or SOMETHING to make you think something interesting/scary/ANYTHING cool was going to happen?
I think it was Shane who noted that it was like an 80's cartoon, and he was spot on.

Here's what they should have done with the film.
Taken out every single character and replaced them with Mikey, Mouth, Chunk and company, added some exciting puzzles and called it Goonies 2.
It's possible it could have played well under those cirumstances.

[Creamdog]

I agree with you completely Elliot. This movie was my only moviegoing experience where I was actually fearing what would be next. After I saw the flying fridge my hands got sweaty and the only thing I could be thinking was "Oh my god, I really hope they won't... aw crap they did already...". I wasn't expecting something as a good as the originals, but as it turned out this film was far beyond the worst I could ever imagine because this was of such an amateurish quality I just would have never held it possible for someone like Spielberg. Like you said, it's not like they never made a film before, or that they were even doing something new, so what the hell went wrong then? What those guys were thinking is completely beyond me. And to think Lucas proclaimed "If you liked the originals, you'll have a great time with this one"... What an insult. Not only towards the audience, but also to the original films.

[HellboyOne]

Unfortunately, money talks. And this movie's made like 700 million worldwide.